Gowden Gate Pawk! (Hrodde)

“Hello, I’m Hroddekiong. In this Docu-series, we’ll go on a Journey. You the Viewers, Me, and the Fluffies we meet along the way. Now, I Doubt very much I have to tell you what a Fluffy is. But for the records sake, let’s all go over it one more time.”

“A fluffy is a Biological Toy produced by the now defunct HASBIO industries. Made to be the perfect Child Companion and Pet… Or at least they should’ve been. If it wasn’t for the Infamous and Hated PETA. Having found and released the Fluffy Creatures too soon, we were left with the aftermath of talking Diarrhea prone pygmy horses.”

“Thanks to PETA, releasing these pour artificial souls onto the world we are absolutely INFESTED with them. Having no natural predator, and omnivorous diet led to their population quickly exploding. And PETA’s Own Kill shelters becoming even more full.”

“It’s a sad reality for most of these tiny horses. Unwelcome in most homes and ill prepared for actual survival… Although. There are places where there puny Ponies can Thrive if they try hard enough.”

The Video zooms out to a Bird’s eye view of San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park.

“Here is Such a place. The Good Ole West… Coast. Mostly moderate weather all year around. Leaving the Lucky Fluffs safe from the tragedy of winter, and Gwassie nummies available all year around.”

“For the Most Part, Wild Fluffies are seen as Pests And killed humanely… If they’re lucky. But thanks to the rules and laws of Golden Gate Park and California. Should a Fluffy end up in that park, people are not allowed to harm or remove it from that land… Fluffs that are somehow smart or fortunate enough to reach the park through the City, are safe to reproduce and eat whatever plants they can.”

“Today, we’re going to Start at the Panhandle. The Beginning of the Park. In order to stop more fluffs from coming in, the homeless have become an impromptu pest control force paid by the city, though for the sake of tourism, they are only allowed to operate at Night. Leaving it open for Fluffy migration during the Daylight hours.”

“Admittedly there’s not much going on here, fluffs just eating and playing freely, safe from the dangers of the City. But… There is a Mean Little trick locals like to play… A simple sentence that often sends them to their doom… Skettiland is on the coast.”

“I like to call this Phenomenon. The Pilgrimage of the damned. That’s all for this episode. Join us next time at next Fluffy Hotspot. Anglers lodge.”

(Woo, this is just intro Chapter. I labeled it Neutral since no Fluffs have been harmed… Yet. There will be Hugbox as well in some chapters. I honestly can’t see murder happening at the Dutch windmill… Beautiful over there.)


GGP: Anglers lodge

“Welcome Back everyone.”

Hroddekiong wades into view, knee Deep in water. Fully kitted out in fisherman gear. A Brown wooden Building in the Background.

“This is the Anglers lodge, sitting just infront of a these clear waters. They offer a Variety of fishing activities, San Franciscans have been learning to fish here for generations! The people here are Kind and Welcoming, even to an Outsider such as myself… Which makes it even Harder to believe, this is the 3rd largest kill spot in the Park, for the unfortunate Fluffy.”

Hroddekiong wades across the screen as it transitions to a Fluffy and her 2 foals, walking around the pond. Hroddekiong begins to Narrate.

“Poor thing… This here is Martha and her Babies; Clark and bruce. She’s a magical Blue, isn’t she? Clark takes after her… While Bruce… Bruce looks closer to a KISS fan than a Fluffy, but cute nontheless.”

“Truly a Sad day for Martha, one of the lessons here is Bait Foraging. Where you, of Course, find bait near your Fishing Spot… Oh… Oh dear.”

martha Continues to march on the shore until she meets Back up with Hroddekiong.

“Hewwo Nicey mistah, can tell fwuffy were skettiland am?”

“I’m so sorry…” Hroddekiong, plucks Clark off her Back gently and holds the Chirping Foal in his Hand. “Ahem… Due to the over abundance of Flu-”

“Babbeh tu wittwe fo upsies! Gib bak tu Mummah!”

Peep peep! Chirp!

“Keep Going Little Fluff… You aren’t going to like what I’m going to do…” the Audio on of the mare is Cut out as Hroddekiong Continues his explanation post recording. “Due to the over Abundance of Fluffies, all Fluffies within 20 yards of the shore are free to use as Bait…” watching the Screen you can see Hroddekiong tying the hook around the foal instead of Piercing it’s skin. “due to their Size, foals are more suited to being a Lure instead of straight bait.” Hroddekiong reeled back and cast his line, sending Clark soundly into the middle of the Waters.


“Wawa Bad fo Fwuffies! Nu huwt babbeh!!”


The mother has resorted to hitting Hroddekiong’s shins, having long exhausted her sorry poopies reserve, splattered across Hroddekiong’s boots. Whom has resorted to Quickly reeling in the Foal.

“This was only a Quick demonstration, so I’ll try not to drown the Foal…”

Hroddekiong hefted the sobbing, coughing and peeping… Waterlogged and distressed, He quickly undid the line around the Foal and gave it back to it’s equally upset mother. “well little Fluff, sorry for the… Everything, avoid the water from now on okay?”

the Furious Mother and her Chirping babies run off, calling Hroddekiong a monster… But ultimately not heeding his advice… Trotting to ask another Fisher for directions to Skettiland.

“And so, With that. We’ll end this episode, and See you again at the Buffalo Paddock.”


(Hello? Have things calmed down or should I stay in my Bunker a while Longer?)

GGP Chapter 3: The Paddock

Hroddekiong can be seen Sitting on a Viewing Bench for the Bison Paddock. Binoculars obscuring his sight of the 3 Bison that were up by the fence.

Bison: “Yeeeeearrrrgh!

“Oop! There you are… Ahem, welcome again viewers! To The Bison Paddock! More of a small zoo exhibit, than a full on reserve for the big beasties!” Hroddekiong scanned the area for Park staff before coming close to the fence and showing a Wheat biscuit to the camera before sticking it through the fence. “now be warned, these Bison are fed by the city, and have plenty of Grazing space. Getting caught by Park employees can lead to a Fine… Which I’ll pay after this Docu-series… Worth.” one of the bison giving the treat a sniff before munching on it.

“Now Of Course! big fence means, don’t go in the area. Bison are Large and can be spooked, it doesn’t take much brain power to put two and two together. People can get hurt very easily… Now Imagine how a Fluffy would approach such a Large Creature… Can’t? No worries, we were able to get some footage earlier in the day.”

a bright orange Fluffy with a blue mane can be seen walking in the pen. Cheeks puffed and head held high.

“Here we See Kyle, according to my film crew he is what is referred to as a Smarty. Most Fluffies are polite enough and Childish beacons of Joy. Their Naivety can Sometimes lead to… An Over inflation of the Ego. Imagine a Bratty Child that has always gotten whatever they wanted at a whim. We’ve all dealt with Overly entitled people. I don’t think I need to explain more.”

Kyle is exploring the Pen, eating away at the grass here and there until they happen upon some Real bison

“Woooow… Big dummeh poopie fwuffs…” trotting up fearlessly “Ou am biges Fwuff… Ou wiww be fwuffies tuffy fwen! Beep! wiww be hewd weader, fowwow beep !”

“We’ve censored the ferals Fluffy name, for narrative purposes… And now we meet truffle. Truffle is an all brown Fluffy mare, she integrated fairly easily into the herd. And has been living with the bison for months, she has her own Fan Twitter and is seen as a Pseudo-mascot of the Bison paddock.”

Truffle walks out from under one of the Bison and up to Kyle.

“Hewwo nyu Fwen… Am Truffle, bison nu am Fwuffy… Dey am Fwuffy Fwen if am Nicie, buh dat Weawwe-”

“Shuddup stoopi Poopie mare! Beep am Smawtteh! Smawtteh knu wha am Fwuffy an wat not Fwuffy!”

“Pwease! Nu shouties! Bison Fwens nu likey tuu loudie noises! Get scawdy!” truffle keep her voice calm and gentle, the Bison around her already started to get on their gaurd. Watching the Orange Fluff.

“Ou nu teww Smawtteh wah du Dummie!” the Smarty getting increasingly loud and Screeching, being told by another fluff he considered a Lesser. Quickly getting on his nerves. He goes to raise a Hoof to Harm Truffle only to immediately get rebuffed by the female Bison, truffle often accompanies. Her fan twitter theorizes that Truffle was Adopted by the Female Bison.

The Orange Brat has been launched a Good 8 feet by the protective mother bison

“SCREEEEEEEE-omph!” with a Broken leg and dizzy from it’s short Flight… It continues to screech and Curse the biges Fluffs that harmed it. Only open it’s eyes in time to see the Bison Charging it.

"This is the moment he knew… He Fluffed up."

“Now… Bison will continue to Charge and batter a Threat until it is either Fleeing for it’s life… Or has lost it’s life. Durable in all the wrong ways, the Charging Circle by the Bison can Last for Hours. The Unlucky Fluffy, repeatedly sent flying and Screaming like a Twisted Beach ball… Sometimes their luck comes in, and are gored by the horns of a Bison. Ending their suffering… This was Not the Case for Kyle… 6 hours and 45 minutes of Bison Ball before He was… Rescued… Or more accurately, thrown over the fence.”

The Screen fades out to Reveal Hroddekiong standing next to the Shambles Of the Still Breathing Kyle.

“Huu…ohwies… Huu h-hewp… Fwuffieeee…” *his legs were nothing more than sacks a bruised muscle and bone fragments, one of his eyes must have become disloged, and Spine snaped like and dying glowstick.

“Now in most cases, finding a Fluffy as Shattered as Kyle, one may be compelled to… Mercy him. But, again by the Parks rules. We are not to touch the Wildlife, and so, we leave Kyle to the Ravages of time…” Stepping over the Hurt Fluffy, and Walking off Screen

“Huh? Hoomin? Cum bak… Hewp Fwuffy… Pwease… Dummeh hoomin? Nu… Nu leave peep

GGP Bonus: Truffle’s interview

The Screen is taken up by Truffle and her big “mummah.”

“How Twuffwe get hewe?”

she takes a moment and paces around the Buffalo/Bison (i get the 2 mixed up too much, same with Ravens and Crows).

“Twuffwe 'membah… Mummah, not Biges mummah buh Mummah mummah. Was pwetty mummah buh no meanie to poopie babbeh. She was… Pinkies an bwue, mummah an bwaddus an sissies wive wit Twuffwe in the see-Tea… Miwkies no am wots… One bwite time, mummah speciaw fwen no come and give twashie nummies… No miwkies, den anudda bwite time… An anudda… So much tummeh huwties. Mummah wah su saddies… Wook at Twuffwe an stawt Hav sad wawas… Nuzzwe Twuffwe an Cwy wong timsies.”

Truffle started Crying herself, not a Loud Ugly cry, but a Silent occasional tear, out of remembrance.

“Mummah say Sowwies an give Twuffwe Wowest owies, num Twuffwe Wingies. Twuffwe Scweam an Nicie mistah Open Doowsies, wook for Wah make woudest noises. See mummah Cwy and start num Twuffwe… He stopped Mummah, no gif huwties. But tawk wit Mummah… Nicie Mistah Weave an Com bak. Give mummah so many gud Nummies so Babies can get Miwkies… Gif Twuffwe Boo boo Huggies, make owies go way. Teww Mummah to go down Biges Hill Gu tu Gowden Gate Pawk! Aww da Nummies Fwuffy can num! an den Mummah went, take aww deh Babbehs with.”

Truffle Sucked on her Hoof for a moment, sad Memories resurfacing like mad.

“It am Wong walkies to Pawk, we get wowest Tummeh owies again by deh time we get hewe. Metaw Munstahs Scawe fwuffies ebey time Hav tu cwoss Woadies… Den we aww see Deh Pawk! So many Gween Nummies, hoomins tu! Stay at Pan hadies fo whiwe, until all Babbehs walk goodies. Mummah heaw sumthin abou Skettiwand! Wan take all deh Babbehs dewe, mo walkies… One Bwite time…Sob…”

Truffle takes another moment to Compose herself and nuzzle against Big Mummahs Leg

“Meow Munstah Com… Chase Mummah an Babbehs, mummah tuwn and gif meow Munstah biges head owies. Teww babbehs tu Wun… So Babbehs Wun… Twuffwe nu stop Wun until She am Hewe… Biges Mummah wook at Twuffwe and Give sniffies, Twuffwe thought Biges Mummah Munstah too, was so scawdies… Den Biges Mummah Give Nuzzwes… Make Babbeh Twuffwe Feew safe…”

“Twuffwe nu knu if bwuddas an Sissies otay… Nu knu if Mummah Mummah otay… Hope dey am’. Mummah Mummah, was Gud Mummah, Twuffwe see how oda Mummahs Tweat Poopie babbehs buh mummah mummah nu du lik dat, all Babbehs samsies tu Mummah Mummah…”

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And that’s where I left off On Reddit. Time to massage the Brain, at last.

You shall soon get some, now that I’ve worked up the nerve.

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GGP: Japanese Tea Garden

Hroddekiong fades onto the screen, drinking from a coffee cup with another in his off hand, full of dry looking biscuits. “Mmm… Hello again viewers.” His voice barely above a whisper as he addresses the camera. “Today, We are in the Japanese tea garden, and out of respect we shall be trying to remain relatively quiet and respectful as we explore how fluffies that have invaded this part of the park, survive.”

Walking down a path in the relatively empty area. "We managed to get a private gadabout this section as to not disturb the other park-goers. Some rules are a bit different, Some rules were made by the management team themselves and the public as to both maintain the population of the fluffies and the condition of the tea garden. Look! over there, this paths ‘Shogun’."

As the Camera Panned over to a long furred fluff, oddly enough dressed in a small Kimono. “Now, Fluffies are free to enter and leave the JTG as they see fit, but only after being told some rules. first and foremost, they must be silent. Secondly, any bathroom business must be done in designated areas. Lastly and maybe most cruely depending on how you view it, any family units can not exceed 4 fluffs.” Silently following the colorful fluff, white mane with a cyan base coat, it’s hair has been done up into a ponytail.

“Now, this male is this paths Shogun… or Samurai. They uphold the rules for living in this area. They gain this position as a sign of trust from the maintenance crew, the clothing and hair are merely to keep within theme. But it also grants them some protection From parkgoers. After making a family within the Garden Limits the are snipped to stop further breeding… After the Fluffy Family picks their chosen 2 children, on grounds of Being kicked out, should they refuse. any and all Fluffs you see that are dressed are protected and not to be touched. you may However, Do this.”

Quickly walking in front of the fluff and making Eye contact, giving a slight bow, and receiving a Bow in turn. taking two of the treats from the paper cup and slipping them into the Shofluff’s kimono pocket. “…Not quite a smarty… just well trained… Now then, what happens when certain fluffs… act up? we’ll be walking around and hopefully we’ll find some rule breakers to show you the proper procedure for punishment.” The camera fading to black yet again for Commercial.

“Ah, Here we go. Some free entertainment.” A wandering Fluff Family can be seen traveling up the path, a Father, Mother and 5 foals, talking and some were walking and they were already causing a ruckus. tearing away at a floral bush.

“Fwuffeh am bestest Daddeh!, find specuwl fwen and babbehs nue Homsies!” The emaciated Male was showing some signs of smarty syndrome, but that isn’t what’s important. What was important is the group of 5 full grown Local Fluffs rolling up on the family, a “Welcome” Party. The same Shofluff from earlier leading the well dressed Group.

Shofluff: “Ecksuze Fwuffy, ou am bweakin da rooz.” a Calm opening to try and solve the situation peacefully. For Simplicity’s sake, the wandering Fluffs will be called Ronin fluffs.

Papa Ronin: “Rooz? Fwuffie no cawe bou Rooz! dis am Fwuffies nue Homsies! an Ou dummie fwuffies! … Dummiw wiewd fwuffies… can stiww join hewd.”

Shofluff: “Dewe am rooz so fwuffies get nummies fwom Hummies, ou no fowwow rooz, ou hafta weave.”

Mama Ronin: “Hummie nummies? wut am rooz?”

Papa Ronin: “Shuddahp dummeh! bestest daddeh got dis… but wut am rooz?”

Shofluff: “Fwuffie hafto be shushies, tu much noises make Hummies mad. fwuffies must nu num fwowas, dey am to wook at. Fwuffies can hab onwy 2 babbehs… an ou hav tu tu manies awweady… hav tu make sum weave.”

Papa Ronin: “…Nu.”

Shofluff: “Nu?”

Papa Ronin: “Fwuffie nu hafta wisten tu dummeh fwuffs wik ou… fwowas and gud nummies, nu need Hummie nums.”

Shofluff: “Den Fwuffy hafto ask ou tu weave gawden… ou nu can num da fwowas or udda fwuffies no get Hummie nums.”

Papa Ronin: “Den odda dummie fwuffs num fwowas tu, easy!”

With an exhausted sigh the shofluff looked around and bowed towards Hroddekiong. “Can 'ou be Spectater?”

Hroddekiong: “I’d be honored. Do you mind if I explain what’s happening to my viewers?” Pointing to the camera

Shofluff: “…be fwuffie guest?” Not entirely sure what the fluff Hrodde was talking about. but he had his own little things to focus on. The Camera-man panning back to Hroddekiong as the Fluffies began making something, the Shofluff guiding his future opponent into the bushes to… relieve themselves.

Hrodde: “So, much like Fluffies in the wild, territorial disputes are settled through combat. but thanks to the Influence of the visitors and the Garden crew, it’s evolved into a kind of Blood sport… based on Sumo wrestling.” The camera panning back to other 4 Fluffies that came with the Shofluff… the Fluffurai? Think of them as equivalent to toughies that follow a Smartie… except not assholes.

The all pulled a piece of chalk from each others Kimonos and drew a rough circle… it was half decent, not perfect… but what do you expect of fluffies? Soon enough the Shofluff and Ronin father returned and the Shofluff began to explain the rules for this bout. For sake of ease, subtitles have been added.

  1. The Human spectator shall announce the beginning of the match.

  2. A fluffy loses when they are either pushed out of the ring or knocked onto their back.

  3. Should the Ronin win, they may stay without resistance from the Fluffies. Though if the Humans take issue, that’s between the Ronin and them.

  4. Should the Shofluff win, the Ronin and his family must leave.

  5. The Ronin may take the challenge as many times as they like… but for each attempt they must forfeit a foal to the Fluffurai.

  6. Should the Ronin attempt to stay even after the loss or reject the competition. The Ronin family will be beaten by the shofluff and Fluffurai. Until forever sleepies or they are chased out.

The Ronin only paid half attention, wanting to fight this challenging weird fluff and be on his way to making a nest.

Papa ronin: “yea yea wa-ebah, fwuffies fite nao?”

Shofluff: “Hummie? mae fwuffies pwoseed?”

Hroddekiong: “Hm? oh uh… Hajime?”

Papa Ronin: “Wha?”

The shofluff was familiar with the starting call and immediately hoofed the Ronin in the face, sending the fool reeling and screeching in pain, tears in his eyes, looking up just in time for a full fluffy powered donkey kick to the face. Tumbling out of the ring in tears, bleeding from it’s nose and mouth as teeth fell out. The shofluff returned to his line and waited for the yowling Papa ronin to stop blubbering.

Papa Ronin: " Ou Dummie fwuff! ou’ cheatsies!" choking his complaints out through broken teeth. it got back up and started charging toward the shofluff, until Hrodde’s leg blocked him.

Hrodde: “Ah ah ah… you know the rules.”

The papa ronin still full of rage turned back to his foals and picked up a dark green foal, the runt of the litter. Putting it down by the Fluffurai. One of them stepped forward, a similar shade of green and picked it up by the scruff. It was lucky, seemingly being adopted on the spot. the Mother fluff sisn’t seem to mind… more nums for her pretty babies. The Papa returned to his line.

Papa Ronin: “Stawt da fite dummeh hoomin…” Rage in it’s eyes, ready for revenge.

Hroddekiong: “Wow… rude… Hajime.”

This time the Ronin reared up high and waited for the Shofluff to charge… which it already had, tackling the Ronin low and knocking it onto it’s back with a meaty thud.

P.R: "SCREEEEEEEEE! CHEATSIES! OU’ AM CHEATSIES!" Hrodde being a Merciful soul rolled it back over and nodded back to the ronin’s children… The ronin returned and with a great deal more hesitation, dragged a Pale almost piss yellow foal over, getting back in the ring. Much like the first it was adopted into one of the Fluffurai’s family. Though with some distance… more likely to be a servant than a true adoption.

Hroddekiong: “You have spirit I’ll give you that… Hajime.”

This round was much slower to unfurl, the ronin was wary of the shofluff, backing up as it stepped forward… all the way out of the ring… like an idiot

Hroddekiong: “And that is Point Shofluff, you stepped out of the ring…”

Papa Ronin: “Wha?” Looking back down to see the chalk line… He looked back to his children and his special friend… instead of dragging another foal it quickly charged forward trying to catch the returning Shofluff from behind. instead recieving another Donkey kick to the face, bone shattering as it’s jaw now hung loose. Screeching echoing from it’s open maw from the pain, it’s special friend running over to check onhim, the other foals falling off her back.

Mama Ronin: “Speshul fwen? neee Huggies?” Unaware of the Fluffurai rounding the sumo circle and lining up at the children.

Shofluff: “Ou hab diswespected da wing… as suchies, ou will wose ou’ Babbehs.”

nodding to the fluffurai as the each put a hoof gently on the backs of the talking foals.

Shofluff: “Fwuffies aww hab dey babbehs, an nu needies more…” Giving another nod to the fluffurai who all slowly added pressure to the foals, begging and shouts of pain emmiting from the babies. slowly and methodically, the tips of their hooves at the base of the necks until… POP! heads either breaking open or seperating from the spine as they babbies lay limp breathing their last. The shofluff approaching the Papa Ronin and stomping repeatedly on the defeated schlumps testicles. new shouts of pain with each stomp. The mummah running over to her bestest babbeh, Picking up it’s dying child and running away… as fast as it’s little feet could, the fluffurai joined the Shofluff and continuing the absolutely brutal beating.

Hroddekiong: “…Oh… wow… uh… jeez that’s a bit over… Ya know what? uhm… I think that’ll be all for today.” Wincing as a particularly brutal stomp sent an eye rolling his way “Damn…”

(Okay. Again… I’m gonna stop writing Fluffy stuff for a while after I finish GGP. so open invitation to other Flufcom members to take up the mantle… I think Mama Ronin has potential for a revenge story? returning to try and avenge her bestest. If you are wondering what I am Writing nowadays. You can find me on r/HFY I’m writing about Chefs in space… good luck, ping me here if you think you find me.)


…I apparently need/want Fluffy seppuku art.